In my state of SAHM-ing, I tend to have a lot of time to think (following a toddler around doesn't use a lot of brainpower), and that tends to be troublesome. You see, my brain likes to pick a direction and take off running. "What if..." and then it's off for hours sometimes, coming up with all these crazy scenarios and ideas of what could/should/would be if this one thing changed.
What if we had another baby?
What if I were pregnant right now?
What if we have another miscarriage?
What if I could maintain a clean house?
What if I had a maid?
What if I didn't burn myself every time I cooked?
What if I hadn't gotten married when I did?
What if I hadn't dropped out of college the first time
The second time?
The third time?
What if I had dropped out the fourth time?
What if we got another dog?
It goes on forever. I try and remember if my brain has always been like this or if this is a result of spending 90% of my day with a tiny tyrant who only speaks 5 words and the rest is gibberish.
Then I'll go on another route of tangents off of those original what ifs and the spiral begins. They could last a few minutes or (rarely) the spirals could go on for days. I feel especially bad for a couple of my very good friends, as well as my husband, because they are the ones forced to deal with the crazy-brain. But, I love them. They always come through when I'm in need.
I'm putting this out there because I know I can't be the only one who's brain runs amuck. How do you handle it? How do you tell your brain to STFU so you can go about your day without wondering where (if at all) you've screwed up in the past or how you'll screw up the future? What do you do?
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Writer and Contributor for the Motherhood Community