Our baby turned 1 yesterday. I has serious mixed feelings about it, but I'm mostly happy. I miss having a tiny baby, but I love watching him grow. For his birthday, we took him to his first Astros baseball game. It was an amazing game. A no-hitter! The first for that pitcher, and the 11th no-hitter (ever) for the 'Stros!
Sometimes, I think the universe (or God, if you prefer) looks at our plans and just laughs. They see our biggest fears and think "yeah, that looks like fun. Let's go!"
1 year ago today, I was sitting at an in-service training, having Braxton Hicks contractions (and freaking out my guy team members), thinking "one more day, and I'll have my son!" I have no idea what the training about. I didn't care, I wasn't paying attention.
I was terrified of giving birth. My biggest fear was that something would go wrong and I'd have to have an emergency c-section or risk the baby. I had a panic attack the night before we went to the hospital, and that was a big chunk of the reason.
Can you guess what happened 6 hours into my labor? Yep! Doc says the baby is in distress, his heart rate drops with every contraction, we need to do a c-section. Fml. Ok! Let's do this shit!!
Turns out the scariest thing was absolutely terrifying, but 100% worth it. Connor was born healthy and perfect. I have a nifty scar on my lower belly, and a fancy story to go along with it.
I have mostly stopped trying to make hard plans for the future. Now, I still make general, long term plans, but they're more like goals than actual plans. The universe has its own plans and it couldn't care less about mine.
Because I swear I watch at least 12 hours of this show a week...I'm getting creative.
Take 3 shots when they're "super big problem" actually is a very simple issue. It's gonna be a long 25 minutes.
Take 1 shot every time Princess Pea pulls some random crap out of nowhere because "a princess is always prepared".
Take 1 shot every time you see Super Letters!
Take a shot when Red loooves rhyming. She's a rhyming skank.
Go ahead and take 3 or 4 shots when they completely massacre a classic fairy tale. It will help you cope with the loss of a childhood memory.
Take another 3 shots when the Super Story Answer doesn't actually "solve" their problem. You just wasted 25 minutes of your life.
This is just a clever little way to make kid shows less miserable. Have fun!
Over the last 5 years of marriage (8 years together) I have discovered a few helpful tips to keep a happy relationship. I don't agree with the "Happy wife, Happy Life" adage. I think that just makes women sound like crazy, controlling, demons. I have yet to meet a woman who fits that description. I believe marriage is a partnership, in which both partners needs to recognize and validate the other's contribution. Here are a few little helpful tips to keep a happy marriage.
Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm a weirdo, freak, anti-feminist, 1950s wife-wannabe. Maybe. That's ok. I love the feeling of being safe and protected by a man. It feels real and secure and I don't think there's any comparable substitution.
We hear it all the time. Breast milk the best option for your baby. It's the healthiest. It will keep your baby healthy. It will help him/her grow big and strong. It's great bond to have with your baby. Nothing can replace that feeling of soothing and comforting your child while nourishing him/her with your body.
Yeah, that's all well and good until you have to go back to work and you can't take a 30+ minute break every couple hours to pump. Then you get to slowly watch your body fail you and make you feel miserable for failing your baby as your boobs dry up.
When he was born, I swore we'd never use formula, because I had boobs and this was their sole purpose in life, right? 3 days later, his doc tells us to start supplementing because my milk hadn't come in yet and he was seriously jaundiced. Well, f*ck. Ok. Fine, we supplement, but breastmilk is always first, then formula if needed.
Then, when he was 3 months old, I went back to work. Let me just tell you right now: pumping in a darken classroom, hearing students in the hallway, hoping that no one knocks or needs to come in for any reason is incredibly awkward. Indescribably so. I managed to pump for about a week. Then Thanksgiving break from school. By Christmas, he was exclusively formula.
I tried to convince myself it was ok, that it didn't bother me that my supply dried up and I couldn't feed my baby anymore, like I was supposed to.
In all honestly, I felt like a big fat failure. Hubby and I had several conversations about it. He was very supportive. Researched ways to increase my supply, then later, found research stated that our son would be just as healthy as breastfed babies when I was panicking and blaming myself for his first cold at 6 months. I kept saying that if I were still breastfeeding, he wouldn't be sick. Hubby comforted me as best he could, but I was sure it was my fault and I had failed our son.
"Breast is best." That is great, except if you can't breastfeed. Then it's just a guilt trip.
For the record, our son is now 11 months old. He'll be 1 on the 21st. He's very healthy, walking like a drunken person and eating more than me most nights. Breastmilk is great. Formula is great too.
You do what is best for your baby. I plan to breastfeed our next child for as long as I can as well. Now, whether that's 3 months or a year, that all depends on my body. Formula is a lot easier, though; expensive, but considerably less awkward with company and not nearly as painful for my body.
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Writer and Contributor for the Motherhood Community